Kilimanjaro conquered, six to go

Mountaineering Kanka Robbie and his good wife Mysterious Kanka Judy recently went on a holiday to Africa. Here is the story:

"It was a shock to go from the cold of Ankara to the heat of Tanzania. We arrived in Dar Es Salaam on a Sunday and it was about 35 degrees. Monday evening after an eight hour bus journey towards the Kenyan border we saw the mountain for the first time and it was seriously tall and intimidating.

Tuesday we started the climb and the first day was all jungle and mud. Mysterious Kanka (aka my wife Judy) had a bit of a stomach thing and tried to work it out several times on the side of the trail. Reached camp that night (3100 m) and got a little shut eye. We were tired, but ready for the challenges ahead, much like ANKARA GUCU!

Wednesday started off well, with great views over the plains and Mt. Meru (4500 m) in the background. After a bit though, the rains came... and came... and came. It probably rained 10 cm or more on us during the day. Serious rain. We approached our campsite for the evening (3800 m) which had half-turned into a river on a hillside. Everything was wet. We knew then that the mountain wasn't going to give up without a fight, much like ANKARA GUCU!

Thursday proved a banner day. We had an acclimatization hike up to lava tower (4600 m) and then back down to a different camp (3900 m) for the night. It was a tough slog and there was still rain. Felt a spot of dizziness coming on at about 4100 m and had to take it down a gear. Learned about the seriousness of altitude today when one of the guides (not ours) had a stroke at 4000 m. Made it to lava tower and on the descent to camp the sky finally opened and we got our first close up of the mountain. There were huge glaciers hanging off impossibly high ridges and cliffs...stuff of legend, much like ANKARA GUCU!

Friday gave us the best views yet as we traversed the mountain a bit more to our next camp at 4000 m. Climbed the infamous Barranco wall on the way and had to contend with porters inching by us on ledges not built for two! Was one of them humming the Ankara Gucu theme song? I couldn't be sure, but it sounded like it. We got to camp after about five hours of work. The porters were amazing, balancing tents, backpacks, water bottles, you name it, on their heads. This is a working man's mountain and I'm sure the porters' blood runs SARI-LACIVERT!

Saturday saw us heading towards the high camp (4600 m) and into position for our summit push. As far as hikes went, this day was one of the easiest, because we could see where we were headed the whole time, a luxury not afforded to the Gucu faithful as Cemal Aydin likes to hide our future behind his coat tails of greed and stupidity. YONETIM ISTIFA!

At midnight, we started for the summit and I can honestly say that it was one of the most serious physical challenges that I've ever faced. Tougher than a marathon ought to sum it up. Because of the lack of oxygen, the pace became seriously slow, like some of Gucu's games. But we battled on ...5000 m ...5100 m. Slowly everything started to change as we were looking down on more than we were looking up at ...5200 m ...5300 m. The moon was so bright we didn't even use any lights to guide our way in the night ...5400 m ...5500 m. The air was so thin that we were managing about one step about every two or three seconds and about 3 breaths for every step! Dawn broke as we hit 5600 m and we could see the crater rim ahead. With agonizingly slow work we crested the crater rim (5735 m) and there it was, a huge bowl of snow more than two miles across! Glaciers were everywhere and not far away along the ridge we could see the summit. With a final push, we reached the top of Africa and the top of Kilimanjaro (5895 m). I was proud as I stood at the top and unfurled the flag of champions. Others lucky enough to be there looked on quizzically, but their faces soon turned to admiration as I dared them with my eyes not to show respect! GURURUMUZ ANKARA GUCU!

The descent ended up taking a day and a half and was uneventful. We took it slowly, basking in our accomplishment and yucking it up with the porters along the way, who are now die hard supporters of Gucu. An adventure worth remembering to be sure.

I am hoping that this has set a few records. If I'm wrong, please write and correct me.

First Gucu flag ever on Kilimanjaro

Highest a Gucu flag has ever been flown

First Gucu flag on any of the seven summits (highest point on each continent)

Hope you enjoyed the story and rest assured that there will be more mountains claimed for our beloved team."